In most crowds it’s easy to pick out the people who regularly work out or play. Others can see it and even sense it in their energy and relaxed ways.

Being able to calm yourself down is a little like that. If you practice regularly, you get good enough to do it well both when you choose to and when you have to: when you’re scared, stressed, angry, upset or even panicky.

Here are my top five steps for calming yourself down:

1. Put both feet on the floor or even better, the ground.

2. Sit or stand in a way that helps you feel balanced, with your core muscles supporting you, your shoulders relaxed—lots of room for your lungs to work.

3. Breathe. I start by exhaling completely through my mouth and then inhaling quietly through my nose for about four counts. Then I hold my breath for around seven counts before exhaling for around eight counts. Make a whooshing sound for extra credit.

4. Now do that a few more times.

5. Finally, express a bit of gratitude for something large or small in you life.

I practice this little exercise often, personally and with clients. Try it out. I think you too will find you’re calmer, less reactive, and more able instead to choose what you will do next. That means that friends, family and colleagues will benefit too. Plus, as one of my wise client points out, “When I calm down I think my IQ goes up!”